One of my readers asked if we plan to involve our children in sports. The short answer is yes, but I’ll go ahead and share a longer explanation.
Mr. Handsome and I both played sports as kids. I did a couple seasons of soccer, of which I don’t remember much–other than that my team names were the Purple Dragons and the Bumblebees. Soccer wasn’t for me, so I began what ended up being many years of group tennis lessons, eventually leading to tournaments and team experience. I also took five years of karate, most of that being two nights a week. My dad took my brother and I downhill skiing many times per winter from the time I was little until I started college. And I had a couple years in high school of intensive badminton competition.
Mr. Handsome played soccer, baseball, and basketball at various points in childhood, as well as two years of high school football and four years of high school basketball. He also took tennis lessons, which worked out great because the two of us are well matched. Both his parents and my parents did a great job at easing us into sports and helping us be well-rounded.
Little Buddy, who will be five in a few months, is currently in the middle of his first season of sports. We chose soccer, and he loves it. We have thoroughly enjoyed watching him interact with his teammates and seeing how proud he is when he scores goals.
That being said, Mr. Handsome and I have decided that we want to be purposeful in what extracurricular activities we sign our young children up for. We want to make sure we don’t fill their schedules too full and prevent them from having time to “just be kids.” Little Buddy already gets a lot of regular social interaction with friends his age, so we aren’t worried about that.
From social media and talking to other moms, I’ve learned that a lot of parents feel pressured into involving their kids as young as age four in multiple sports per season, which means two nights a week of practices and a full day of games on Saturdays. For most young children, I think that kind of schedule has the potential of being stressful and overwhelming and could eventually result in burnout.
I continuously remind myself that Little Buddy will only be “little” for so long and that there will be plenty of years for him to be involved in sports. That being said, we also see the value in giving him some exposure to team sports at this age, as long as he is having fun and we aren’t filling his schedule too full. Aside from organized soccer, we have both enjoyed introducing him to other sports and outdoor activities. As I write this post, he is outside with one of his grandmas throwing a frisbee.
What are your thoughts on early childhood sports? There are now wrong answers because every kid is different.
When I was growing up, very few kids played organized sports before they were in junior high. Some of the boys played baseball and some of the girls took dance or baton, but mostly we just ran around outside together and made up our own games with whatever sports equipment the families had. It sure didn’t involve our parents having to pay anything, drive us anywhere, or sit on the sidelines to watch (we didn’t want them around!). It didn’t take up their evenings or Saturdays. The games ended when it was suppertime or bedtime. Of course back then, there were 2-3-4 kids in every house on every block. We didn’t have to go far to find someone to play any kind of game with. Neighborhoods had parks and school yards with baseball diamonds, basketball courts, and tennis courts. You could walk to them and play for free. Everybody had a grassy back yard. You probably don’t live anywhere like that now. People make fun of Boomers but they don’t know what they missed! We had plenty of time to just be a kid. We had schools with gym classes that introduced us to different sports, and teams of every kind after school, on the school grounds or sponsored by the school. We even had a ski team and a golf team. I feel sorry for the stressed-out parents these days, trying to juggle work, dinner, homework, and bedtime around sports they have to drive to and pay for. Ugh.
I agree with you–that sounds like a really good childhood.
I did the actually the same as anonymous 4 :55 pm did. Except we did have a ski team or golf team
Kids are too young for sports, when they get older they are going to having problems with their legs. They re going to have to have Alc surgery .
I new someone who’s son was in sports at a young age and hurt is ankle can’t place sports every again. He hadn’t have s rews put in his ankle he broken it so bad. Know he’s doing Robert’s instead of soccer.
Kids legs are delevelp yet tell their are12 or 13 years old.
I would never put my kids in sports. I’m letting my kid be normal kid.
And it’s expensive here were I live it cost 2 hundred dollars to get your kid in a sports
I personally think that exposing them early to anything they’re interested in–be it sports, music, art, etc.–is ideal. I’ve had two kids in sports over the course of the last decade, and while it can be a lot and carries its own set of sacrifices, I feel like we’ve done our part to give our kids the opportunity to have those social experiences and try to excel in their chosen activities. If it’s something they’re passionate about, I never want to be the reason they don’t get a chance to excel or explore, at either end of the spectrum. I have one kid who played varsity basketball in 8th grade and that has involved a lot of commitment all around over the years. I have another kid who likes sports but isn’t quite as driven. He’s done soccer for years but wanted to try baseball as a 10yo this summer. I felt a little bad we weren’t more proactive in offering up baseball earlier as I didn’t want to put him in a situation where other kids had been playing for 5+ years and he couldn’t keep up. We did manage to find something for him that was a good fit for his level, but it was a reminder to always keep an open mind. He started playing an instrument last year too, so I guess what he lacks in focus he makes up for in variety. But ultimately I want my kids to lead the way with activities–with appropriate guidance if anything feels like a bit much, or maybe a little encouragement if they’re not as excited but it feels like a good “life lesson” opportunity. I think the teamwork aspects, commitment, and athletic activity can be great, but kids are fickle so be prepared for u-turns and resistance, and just do what you can to protect yourself financially and mentally (i.e., don’t do long term commitments or shell out thousands for a new thing). Every kid is so different so all you can do is try! But I feel like I am extra hesitant by nature so I’ve had to work hard at being open to letting my kids do their thing even when it feels like a lot! In the end it’s still a series of short seasons of life so I just take them as they come and make it work!
I had 4 little ones involved in various sports, dancing, art classes, and I was very stressed shuffling them around, but by the time they hit middle school, they had lost interest and took up band, chorus and 4-H. High School came and 2 went to work, while 1 stayed in band and the other started JROTC. To tell the truth, when the last child graduated, I was so happy. I haven’t been to a football game or Christmas parade since.
My 8 yo and 7 yo played a six weeks baseball softball through a local community program. It was May-June and it was a perfect time frame so that they get the experience then the rest of summer for other sports and kinds of play. My 5 yo who loves baseball was too shy to participate with his team so we will give him another shot next year! They also did a 4 week course of basketball in January through the same community (the older two did.)
My boys play a lot of soccer in our backyard, football in our backyard. And they invented ‘trampoline soccer,’ recently that they love. I agree with your sentiments to expose them to sports but give time for other things and creativity. We don’t want to tire them with too much of one thing! Especially since we don’t know what they will ultimately like so variety is definitely best. My oldest just started his interest in football this year.
Also, my boys love fishing. Over the summer we got them down to the water to do that 3-4 times a week. They don’t need to be in actual programs either and I don’t think the younger the better- they are all so different! Like I said my 5 yo loves baseball but just wasn’t ready. He likely will be next year.
My girls aren’t interested in team sports so far, but we do swim lessons on and off all year. Our community center lets you sign up for lessons a month at a time, and I appreciate that we can take a month off if we want.
I’m relaxed about extracurricular activities, but it is very important to me that my children can swim well. It’s a safety issue, plus the pool is a lot more fun when you are a confident swimmer.
That’s great! Swimming is an important skill. We did lessons this summer for Little Buddy, and they went really well.
Why would you even put a preschooler in organized sports?? That’s ridiculous! Shouldn’t they just be taking music, swimming, or individual lessons for fun at that age?
…Or running around the yard with other kids, using their imaginations to play. The rest can wait. I have a feeling there’s some peer pressure among parents to get their kids into something as soon as possible. Bobby has to do it because Timmy and Billy do it… Next thing you know, everyone is miserable. Kids feeling pressure to perform well, parents watching their kid AND the clock because time is tight… This is healthy??
Have you seen some of those sports matches? Kids upset and crying, parents yelling at the kids and at each other, even violence breaking out. It’s crazy.